Dr. John Sarno · earthworms · fur babies · going to get better · journaling · Judas Priest · Nicole Sachs · recovery

Journaling, earthworming and hoping

I’m almost done reading “The Mindbody Prescription: Healing the Body, Healing the Pain” by Dr. John Sarno MD and I have to say—

I truly believe there’s something relevant to my pain within these pages.

I’ve also started listening to someone who studied with Sarno named Nicole Sachs. I watch her YouTube videos while I’m working. I’m going to buy this woman’s book today because everything she says makes sense to me. And to be honest, I’m getting so tired of living with pain.

I mean, fuck this stuff. I’m ready to do anything to get rid of it.

I’m seeing a chiropractor who’s trying to move my crooked tailbone externally. I have a new and improved physical therapist who is helping with the muscles all around down there (and if you don’t think that hurts-you’ve got another thing coming)

Hey. That reminds me of a song from when I was 15. I saw the Screaming for Vengeance tour live. Rob Halford beating his motorcycle with a whip, lasers going off everywhere. The whole enchilada.

Did I think then that I’d ever be some 50 year old woman struggling with pain?

Hell no.

Pisser about Glenn Tipton though, huh.


Anyway–here ya go:

So back to YouTube Nicole. This lady encourages her students to make lists of things, memories, character traits that bother us. It can be anything. Then she encourages us to take 20 minutes a day, pick a topic from our lists (my lists are loooonnggg) and purge on paper about that topic.

I did my first 20 minute journal exercise this morning. I wrote so much, I almost set the notebook on fire. I even had to go back after my 20 minutes was up to add stuff. Hope that’s okay. I’m betting it is.

I felt tired when I was done. Like I worked out. And I wrote a lot of shit I always think but never say.

I think I did the exercise right. I almost spelled out “write” just then. Ha.

I am hoping like mad this is the answer I’m looking for. I’m ordering Nicole’s book today.

I’m stopping at nothing to feel better again.

I’m not living out the rest of my years feeling like crap, emotionally or physically. That’s for damn sure.

In other news this morning, the earthworms and birds are out in full-force.

I tried to show Penny this guy this morning, but poor pooch–she was looking everywhere like–what? What the hell are you showing me? Look how fat Mr. Worm is. Hope he has a good day and doesn’t get eaten. But if he does, some bird is gonna be lovin’ it.

Also, Penny Lane started her new drug regimen last night. We all slept pretty peacefully all night long. What a fucking relief.

If we can get Penn’s seizures under control, I’m going to guess my anxiety/ stress might also come down about a million notches. That would help ease my pain, too.

Doesn’t it all just sound so lovely.

Fingers and toes crossed for much better days ahead.

epilepsy · fur babies · McDonalds hamburgers

Penny update

Penny was examined by her neurologist Dr. Dixon today. We’re happy to report that she didn’t need any tests done, and the doctor recommended upping her medication for the time being. We also got another anti-seizure med to use when and if another big one happens so that she won’t have more than one.

The vet was very nice.

I had an adrenaline rush of relief when we left that place. I think ever since she had that first big seizure in October, I’ve had in the back of my mind that maybe something awful might be lurking in her head. And I’ve been freaked about it since. It’s nice to get some freaking relief for a change.

We had a long morning, the 3 of us, so we got McDonalds for lunch.

Penny has never been through a fast food drive-thru before. She couldn’t believe how great it was! She thoroughly enjoyed her own hamburger when we got home.

Glad this day is over.

Here’s to less seizures and less worry from here on out.

dog · epilepsy · fur babies · pets · stress


We have a 2 year old dog named Penny Lane. She’s quite gorgeous and one of the most loving pups you could ever meet.

My husband calls her “lovey dovey puppy”. He loves her-a lot. She loves him, too.

I love her even though her puppy years which included tormenting our cat were kinda annoying.

But that’s all settled down.

Even the cat loves her now. I’m always delighted when I see them sleeping on a bed together or when they pass each other in a hallway and bonk heads together as a gesture of friendship.

Of course, if this was the whole story and we could all ride off into the sunset together, that’d be great!

But there’s a crappy part:

Penny has epilepsy.

It started last October with a series of big seizures in a row one night that sent us flying off to the vet. We had no idea what was happening. We’ve never had a dog have seizures before. Penny was put on phenobarbital and we hoped that was the end of that.

Of course it wasn’t.

It seems like she goes for a month seizure-free, then she has a cluster of them, usually on a Sunday when the vet is closed.

Since October, her medication has been upped 4 times. Just this past weekend, after one big seizure and a few small ones, we added a 3rd capsule of zonisamide.

I’m getting ready to call her vet again when they open in 15 minutes.

She had a little seizure this morning as we laid in bed together. At the time she was curled up against me, cuddling away. It made me feel horrible when it happened, but glad I was there to soothe her. Shortly after, we took a brisk walk around the block where she basically dragged me. Then we played fetch for a while in the yard. She liked that.

Thankfully now she is sleeping peacefully. But I’m on guard that another seizure might come out of nowhere.

These seizures, they tell us, don’t hurt her. She emerges from them discombobulated but then bounces back pretty quickly.

The seizures make my pelvic floor clench up from stress. They make my husband’s stomach flare up with stress. And our cat overgrooms like crazy every time a seizure happens.

Poor kitty is freaked out. Because she loves her dog sister.

Anyway, I just wanted to write about this portion of our lives lately. It’s been a real string of pure crap lately, for whatever reason.

Hopefully we’ll be getting some excellent help for our pretty Miss Penny Lane here soon. Wish us luck.

Want to see a picture of her?

Hang on to your hats–she’s pretty adorable.

Bill and Titters and I think she’s “the bomb”.

Here ya go: